Surprise!!

It is really surreal for me to be writing this post right now...  here we are at the end of Day 2 with the sweet new baby girl sleeping in the next room who we are in the process of adopting.  It has been a whirlwind these past 3 weeks, and we can't believe we actually have her in our arms and in our home in just 3 weeks after we heard she was being placed for adoption. 

Here's the quick version of the story and how it all came together:

(but follow closely... it gets confusing!)

A few weeks ago, a friend of ours, told another friend of ours who didn't know we were adopting, that our family was looking to adopt and would be a good family for this sweet baby girl they knew about that may be being placed for adoption soon...  they asked us if we'd be interested in adopting this baby girl if that indeed happened.  Our friends told the baby's birthfamily about us, and the ball starting rolling from there...

Her birthfamily decided that we were the best placement for her, and here we sit with a sweet and beautiful 2 month old baby girl who is adored by our whole family.  She was born April 24th, weighing 6 lbs. 1oz.  and is still a tiny little bit weighing  9 and a half pounds.  She was given a beautiful name by her birthfamilies, which we will announce soon hopefully, after we have decided on what her full name will look like after we add a name of our own!

She is not legally "ours" yet, and we are hoping things go smoothly and that God will guide the steps of all involved these next couple weeks as we get everything signed and taken care of.  Please be praying, friends, for this along with us... thank you so much.    We have seen God move mountains these past couple weeks and move in obvious ways that have humbled and amazed the socks off of us.  We can't wait to see what He does next in the life of this little one. 

Here is the day we met her last Tuesday... it was LOVE at first sight. 

I held her tight the whole time and cried my eyes out to let her go. 

Her first nap at home yesterday... snooze away, sweet baby!

I was loving trying her on for size in the Moby wrap my buddy Sarah let me borrow... she thought it was pretty cozy ~ I can forsee her spending lots of time in this when Jeremy goes back to work... hands free is a great thing when we're wanting to keep her close, but also take care of 4 other children! 

The first time I fed her a bottle yesterday,  she's a great eater and gets really excited when that bottle comes near!  She is a great sleeper too ~ (insert Halleluia chorus) ~ our first night, last night, she slept a 6.5 hour stretch, then a 2.5 hour one before I had to wake her up to go to church this morning and show her off!  We held on tight to her today, and didn't pass her around at all... she slept through the whole thing and had no idea how loved and long-awaited she has been. 

Welcome home!  The moment we brought her home, I snapped this picture... 

She seemed happy to be here, don't you think?

Gotcha Day!  Yesterday, as you can see, Jeremy and I were just beaming as we got ready to load her up and bring her HOME!  Her birthfamily is just a dear family who are simply amazing people who have taken amazingly loving care of her, and we are excited to have them in our lives. 

Meeting her sisters for the first time. 

Any time she is out of our arms, there are usually 4 little faces peering in at her...  they love to be by her... Annika calls her "baby sissy" and the first thing out of her mouth this morning when I picked her up out of her crib was, "baby still here?"  Yes, sweet daughter, we're hoping she's here FOR GOOD. 

Getting ready for her first bath, while her adoring fans look on.

First bath in our home finished!  She loved it...  we heard she loved bathtime.

If you think you're shocked about how quickly God brought us together,

you're not alone.  We are still spinning! 

We look forward to giving you more updates, and hopefully downloading some video soon!

Thank you for all your love and support... we have dear friends and we are so thankful for each of you. 

almost recovered

Hi friends... sorry about the long break in blogging... I'm now on day 10 of the worst sickness I've ever experienced!  I somehow got Fifth Disease, and seriously suffered through it.  I had the fever/chills for 5 days and ZERO energy, then got a lovely hot, burning rash for a couple days along with zero energy, and now the joint pain has been my biggest issue these past 3 days, it has NOT been fun.  Today is the most I've spent out of bed in a week and a half, but I'm on pain medication to help with this awful joint pain that is the worst in my shoulders.   So my bed has been my life, not much else to blog about!  But I can see the end and am praying it settles in soon and this joint pain says goodbye forever! 

I've questioned so many times the timing of this for more reasons than one, but the one thing God has shown me is that HE KNOWS and He's got it covered.  He's got me covered.  So hopefully I'll be blogging again about life and kiddos soon!  Thanks for all of your prayer, practical help, and words of comfort during this awful past week,  I'm so thankful. 

lovin' this article..

This entire post was copied from this blog... I like the article so much I have to share it:


I came across this article yesterday and I just thought it was so well written. Although from a different religous viewpoint, I could not agree more....



A funny thing happened to me the other day when my wife and I had, thank God, another baby (a boy). Many of my friends didn't seem all that happy for me. Sure, they went through the motions of smiles and congratulations. But it was evident that many thought me insane. Why would a young man and his wife ruin their lives with eight children? Who could afford the Jewish day-school bills? Didn't we want to live life a little, and not just be burdened with kids?



It got downright surreal when a European film company, pressed me, while my wife was in labor, to finish shooting a segment that had an urgent deadline (I obviously told them they were insane). And the next day, I was mildly criticized by a Jewish organization which was supposed to be hosting me for a lecture for having to cancel on them because the lecture clashed with the baby's bris.


I don't mind that the world doesn't really love babies, just that it pretends to. It's time we got honest about our priorities. Most people get a new car every two or three years, but one or two babies through the life of their marriage is plenty. You can get drunk on an airplane, laugh hysterically with your mates, and still not really anger people. But if you dare bring a crying baby on board you will be given malicious looks as if the little thing is a package that ticks. If you walk your dog along the street, people will stop you to tell you how cute he is. If you walk down the street with a baby, you might find a woman or two who coos, but for the most part, you'll be utterly ignored.




Indeed, the contempt shown to parents of many children is the last acceptable prejudice in our society. As a father of a large family, I find myself apologizing wherever I go, as if I committed a crime. The frequent and loaded stares from scornful onlookers imply that the famine in Africa was caused by my selfish insistence on overpopulating the earth. Long ago my wife and I discovered that few hotels were prepared to accommodate so many children, even if we took three of four rooms, which is why we bought an RV for travel.


How strange to live in a world where loving children casts one in infamy. Having a family with many children implies a backwardness and primitivism that is deemed unbecoming in the developed countries of the West. Large families, it is thought, exist only among religious weirdoes or the teeming hovels of the Third World.


Rich countries, by contrast, prefer to increase their standard of living rather than the number of the living. Looking at Western birth rates for the year 2001, the United States averaged only 14.2 births for every thousand Americans, and the birthrate among white Americans is so low that the United States will soon lose its white majority. Indeed, one can go for days in a wealthy city like Manhattan without encountering a single pregnant woman. Riches and children have become inversely proportional such that the more of the former, the less of the latter.


Hence, the high birth rates of extremely poor African nations like Uganda – at 47.52 births per 1,000 – or Niger with 50.68 births per 1,000, are deemed to be prime causes and indicators of their penury. The abundant fertility and unconstrained sexuality of these countries confirms the unspoken Western mindset of these country's inhabitants as being just one step above savages. Contraception has become a synonym for civilization.


A Christian mother of six once wrote to me, "I find it troubling to worry about getting pregnant again ... because I don't want to face the criticism of friends and family. Why do people not see children as a blessing?" A fair question which deserves a fair response.


Why is it that even many synagogues today are not children friendly? Why are people impressed that Jay Leno owns 20 motorcycles, but disgusted that some religious families choose to have 10 children?


Let's not finesse the response. We all know why. A world that has lost its innocence has trouble appreciating beings who are innocent. A world that has become selfish has soured to the idea of leading a life of selflessness. A world that has become grossly materialistic is turned off to the idea of more dependents who consume resources. And a world that mistakenly believes that freedom means a lack of responsibility is opposed to the idea of needy creatures who "tie you down."


They can go fly a kite.


By just looking at my children, I become more innocent. By loving them, I become more noble. By spending my money on them rather than myself, I find transcendence. And by being a father and liberating all of the love in my heart, my spirit soars free. I work hard to support a large family and I give up no pleasures in doing so because my children are my foremost pleasure.


I am often asked by women dating men how to tell whether they are marriage material. I tell them, "See if he enjoys children." A man who loves children is playful. He will spend his life joking with his wife because he loves to see her laugh, and will flirt with her because he loves to see her smile.

 

There was a time when husbands and wives worked hard to ensure they could afford the blessings of a large family. Today, the higher your earning bracket the fewer children you have, but then we always knew that many turn money from a blessing into a curse.



Before he died, the Lubavitcher Rebbe launched a campaign asking parents to have one more child than they originally planned. It is a campaign that a dwindling Jewish community should revive as it continues to disappear.






Posted: March 02, 2006
1:00 am Eastern
By Rabbi Shmuley Boteach
© 2010 WorldNetDaily.com

Adoption Yard Sale!

We are now recovered from last weekend's yard sale to fundraise for our future adoption!

We have amazing friends and family (35 families to be exact) who donated all their "junk" for us to sell!  Well, apparently they have really good junk because we raked in nearly $3,000 in two days...  we are SO thankful to all of you who took the time to go through your things so we could have a really HUGE sale.   Adoption as a way for a child to enter a family is so different in our eyes than a child entering our family through pregnancy...meaning that the whole community can be involved in bring this child home, and we wouldn't have it any other way. Helping orphans (and widows) is not really a command from God, it's simply a description of something Christians do... adoption isn't always the way each person should help... but your involvement in our adoption story and those of others is definitely making a difference!!!

The kids had so much fun manning the bake shoppe stand ~ thank you to all of you who baked or brought goodies for them to sell!  Gavin's line he repeated all day long was, "Donate here at the bake shoppe, donate here!"  He'd say it over and over again.. I had to keep reminding him to only say it once to each customer! 

Thank you to all of you who came by to see us, some of you drove a long way to come visit.  We so appreciate you!  We had such fun talking with members of our community and hearing about their experiences with adoption.  We also loved educating folks about adoption and about what kind of adoption we're feeling pulled toward. 

It poured down rain during the whole set-up day... I wish you all could have seen Mary M. and I setting up that huge tarp tent for 2 hours in the pouring rain!  We did it, and were proud of it!  We had pretty great weather the 2 days of the sale, minus a bit of rain the first day.  Thank you to Sandra F. who so graciously hosted our family and all of our junk at her house for 3 LONG days last week.  Thank you also to my set-up crew and selling/organizing help:  Jenn H., Rachel K., Carly G., Sandra F., Tasha B., Jessica C., Mary M., Sarah N., and Kiana & Kaylyn.   There is no way we could have pulled this one off without all of you!  We are praising God with His provision and were so encouraged by the generosity of others both monetarily and with their time.  We want this money to be used to glorify His name through the adoption of the next little one to join our family. 

the music returns and more

I removed the music player a few weeks back because it cussed out a friend of mine!  Yikes, hope that hasn't happened to anyone else that I don't know about.  Ha ha.. 

I love the music player, it really is for me... but I hope you enjoy it too!  It's all of my favorite songs right now as we are getting closer (hopefully) to bringing our baby home.  My hope is in the Lord and His timing and I know it will be PERFECT when the time comes, no earlier - no later - than it is supposed to happen.  These songs bring me hope and help me to remember God's plan is SO much bigger than mine. 

I thought add on a couple pics onto this post, cuz I hate posts without pics!

This is the girls a few nights ago right outta the bath... aren't they sweet sisters?

And I'm sure most of you know about Gavin's accident 2 weeks ago...

but if you don't here's the short version:  He flew off the swingset after colliding with his sister, backflipped and landed on his stomach on a fallen tree like 5 feet behind the swingset.  He fractured his right kidney and it hemmoraged.  He's fine, taking it easy and feels perfect now.  We're so thankful for God's loving hand protecting our boy, it could have been a LOT worse.  The Dr.'s said that had he landed lower, it would have been a MUCH worse injury to the kidney.  I took this picture of us waiting after the CT scan, because he wanted to be sure that Drew and Morgan saw the contraption on his arm.  It was his IV port, or whatever it's called...  he was such a trooper that day. 

road trip

Yesterday, I was booked to do wedding hair for a large bridal party in the beautiful Girdwood!  The boys were spending the night at their grandparent's so Jeremy and I packed the girls up, and he spent the day bumming around Girdwood and the hotel for the day while I worked! 

There's nothing quite like the view along the arm on the way there... we watched for beluga whales, but none were seen that day! 

Megan, the beautiful bride and I!

what's shakin' bacon?

Okay, okay.. what's going on with us?  Yikes, my mind has been SO preoccupied with adoption that even blogging about normal life has been a challenge.. so how about I blog about adoption and not normal life! 

In the last month, I've been in communication with a number of expectant moms looking to place her baby (or babies) for adoption.  At the moment I'm talking with 3 of them.  It'll all online communication via instant message or facebook messages... I haven't talked to any of them on the phone, and as of a week ago, none of them had contacted Everlasting Adoptions about us.  I'm working at keeping things in perspective and knowing that there is a really big chance that none of these babies will be ours.  I'm imagining that the situation will sneak up on us... when we are clueless and unsuspecting!  But communicating with these women is really good practice for me, and it's encouraging that they want to talk to me.  They don't have to, so I know that in one way or another, our family is inviting to them! 

Two of the moms I'm talking with are due in August, and one is due in September.  It's an exciting time for us, to know that there are women who, after viewing our profile (4 kids already and all) are still interested in us.  There was a young woman who is due in October who told me a couple weeks ago, that she really liked us, and we talked for a week.. but the baby's father was concerned by how far away we lived from them and didn't want to pursue us any more.  Those kind of disappointments are not uncommon, and I'm really learning to thicken up my skin and KNOW that that baby just simply isn't who God planned for our family.  There is great comfort in letting God's plan unfold.  And we're doing just that. 

I'll keep you updated if anything looks like it's for REAL and we become officially matched... 

Kool-Aid Play Dough

Hey friends, just wanted to share our family's favorite play dough recipe with you!  If you've never made this, it's a must do project!! It takes less then 10 min. and is such fun. 

2 1/2 cups flour
1/2 cup salt
3 T oil
1 T cream of tartar
2 packets kool-aid (any flavors.. you can do two different colors by splitting the batch in half)
add 2 cups boiling water

mix with spoon, then knead with hands when it's cool enough for you...  store in ziplocs when done! 
It smells so yummy and is edible in case your little ones sneak a bite. Also, we only had one kool-aid packet on hand, and it turned out great.  Yummy grape play dough!  :)  Enjoy!!!

how I love thee, Vitamin D

After nearly 4 months of vitamin D supplementation and thyroid hormone replacement, I had some blood work done in the last couple weeks to check my levels.  This week I learned that my thyroid levels are great and that my vitamin D levels jumped from the severely low 18 to 125!!!  I can really feel the difference too.  Vitamin D is amazing.  I'll never be off of it for as long as I live.  It is so misunderstood and SO important.  It's not just about getting a little from the sun...  Google "the miracle of vitamin D"  and see for yourself.  I'm a believer.  My severely low vit. D level along with my low thyroid wrecked havoc on my body and now I feel like a new me.  Yahoo! 

Summit VI conference

Each year, the Christian Alliance for Orphans holds

it's conference to accomplish the following:

• 
  
  help people start orphan care ministries in the local church 
• 
  
  encourage adoptive families and cover adoption issues
• 
  
  encourage foster families, social workers, etc.. and cover the issues involved
• 
  
  education about global orphan care including projects to be involved in and adoption
• 
  
  open our eyes and hearts to the need right in our backyards and around the globe
• 
  
  confirm God's calling in our lives to defend the fatherless

Here's a partial view of the exhibitors that took part in the Summit.

Adoption agencies, overseas child sponsorship programs, organizations

that exist to stop human trafficking, Family Life, Focus on the Family, programs to empty foster care systems through adoption, and many, many more!!  It was a fun and educational place to be in and browse thru.  I came home with a bag full of free books, brochures, business cards, and information. 

During many parts of the conference, my heart was very heavy.  The first day was mentally tough for me.  It was a long day (wonderful, though) and this area/ministry is all new to me... and I was hearing some things that tugged my heart and ripped it to pieces.  The first time I walked through the exhibits and talked with folks, it was hard for me to hold back the tears and the lump in my throat was throbbing.  The tears were held back, only by the grace of God, if you know me it's impossible for me to stop tears...  I didn't want to explain to these people how overwhelmed I was about our world and it's children.  But, I guess if anywhere is a safe place to just lose it, THIS WAS IT.  They get it. 

Here's our new buddy Natasha!  She and a bunch of other wonderful women came from Wisconsin, were staying at our hotel, and adopted Carly and I into their group.  Natasha drove us back and forth to the conference each day... after a little shuttle mix-up.. God provided new friends and a ride!  It was a huge encouragement to meet with others in the same mindset toward all things adoption/foster care/ministry.  Each had a completely different story to tell.  And I was intrigued by each. 

More of our "group."

Steven Curtis Chapman sharing and giving us an accoustic concert!

His music is so powerful.

Steven and Mary Beth Q & A!!! 

I love these two.  They have been so open in sharing the raw, honest truth

about their lives since the loss of their 5 year old daughter Maria 2 years ago. 

We REALLY enjoyed our night when them. 

Mary Beth was our keynote speaker the first night, and shared some fun

archived family photos too!!  Wow, is all I have to say about this one!!!

Here we are on the trip home in our matchy-matchy orange shirts... we got a lot of looks, but more importantly a lot of questions!!!!  educate, educate, educate... something I love to do...  there are approx. 147 million orphans worldwide.  And only about 30,000 are adopted into families each year... seems like a lot.. but is it??

Some of the things different speakers shared that have stuck with me and will continue to stick:

1. 
   
   If we are only motivated by the need, we will run out of gas.  (there will always be need!) God is the source, our motivation.
2. 
   
   Love for orphans TRANSFORMS!
3. 
   
   Open your eyes to what God did for you as an orphan... YOU were an orphan and He had compassion on you.  "In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will - to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves."  Ephesians 1:5
4. 
   
   Orphan care is not a new craze or fad for social ministry.
5. 
   
   With your life and voice, defend the fatherless!
6. 
   
    Adoption is not the only, nor always the best way to care for orphans.
7. 
   
   Just because a child is adopted or removed from an orphanage, doesn't mean they will lose their orphaned spirit... only Jesus can redeem them. 
8. 
   
   We work/love on behalf of orphans because of God, not because of empathy and sympathy.
9. 
   
   How can we shame pregnant women, then be surprised when they secretly abort?
10. 
    
    Some choose international adoption so they won't have to deal with a birthfamily.  No matter what, you will have to deal with a birthfamily and your walk may be harder because there will be no reunions. 
11. 
    
    Children don't just need food, clothing, and shelter... they need the love of a family.
12. 
    
    John Piper shared the rest of these statements:   You cannot be involved in adoption and orphan care without miracles happening in your life.
13. 
    
    do hardships = mistake??  NO! There is no guarantee of success and comfort. 
14. 
    
    God is totally, always on our side as a believer... it has nothing to do with our virtue. 
15. 
    
    Having faith is not the ultimate factor whether you suffer or prosper in the cause of the fatherless or any situation. 
16. 
    
    God himself in Jesus is better than any happy ending in this adoption story. 
17. 
    
    Those who love God more than life and suffer willingly in the cause of the fatherless are God's great gift to the world.  Heb. 11:37
18. 
    
    and my final favorite (not from John P.) James 1:27 (to care for orphans and widows in their distress...) is not a commandment, caring for orphans is a definition of what a Christian does. 

So I guess you can say, I have a LOT to chew on... and a lot to share with Jeremy.  Carly and I are chompin' at the bit and ready to gather our team and launch our church's ministry later this year.  As a hopeful adoptive family, this conference has given much confirmation of this being God's plan for us as a family... but I have to warn you... I'm not sure where it will stop! 

We are so thankful for this opportunity God has provided through our church, for them seeing this as a part of our church's future, and for "getting it" right along with us. 

That's all for now, my brain is filled to the brim.  I'm sure some future blog posts will be highjacked by this very topic as more thoughts flow out of my mind and through my fingers on the keyboard. 

Thank you for reading all the way through this!

Shopping!

After Carly and I stepped off the plane Tuesday evening... we dropped our bags at the hotel, wasting no time and headed to IKEA!  We had dinner there and closed down the store...  I love that place!  Jeremy must have been praying really hard, because I only spent $6.24!  It's a MiRaCLe!  :)  We were seriously tired, but SO happy!

Then the next morning, my dear friend Elaine and her youngest, Collin picked us up and took us to the Mall of America for the day.  It was ginormous and fun!  We were there for 9 HOURS...  and had to rent a shopping cart at the mall to tote our bags.  And again... Jeremy must have been on his knees...  because I was puzzled as to why things weren't jumping off the rack at me, shouting "pick me!" 

We had a blast!!!!!  The American Girl store was of first stop, and possibly the place I was looking forward to seeing the most!  We don't own an AG doll yet, but we own Target's version.. and Morgan and I love pouring over their catalog. 

Man, this place is spendy.. but oh, so wonderful. 

I actually always wanted my own doll, but I was too old when they came out and now???  I guess I can live vicariously through my daughter's dolls.  :) 

This is the outfit I'm excited to surprise Morgan with!

The LEGO Imagination Center was amazing, and I was

so sad my kids weren't there to share in it. 

us planning to be scared while a shark eats us...

and the real deal.. 

This was a fun, fun way to start our trip in Minneapolis!

heading out!

Tomorrow morning, my buddy Carly and I are heading out to Minnesota for the rest of the week.  We are in need of  prayer for our health, back/neck/shoulder issues for the both of us, safety, our families back home, and that God would speak through this conference directly to us.  We can't wait to be immersed in the global ministry to orphans/foster care/adoption and find out how we can help through our local churches and in our own hearts.  Ta ta for now... pictures and fun to come! 

goin' green in the basement

Jeremy is in full swing gardening mode.  He began planting downstairs in March, one month earlier than last year so maybe we'll have red tomatoes this year!  We have garlic, onions, herbs, tomatoes, broccoli, brussel sprouts, different squashes, cabbage, peppers, cucumbers, and more growing downstairs!  A few of the plants like lettuces, spinach, carrots, and potatoes he'll plant directly in the ground in about a month or so. 

parsley, brussel sprouts, and basil he just planted!

little cabbages

I'll post again when our rack is overflowing with plants ready to go outside and in the greenhouse!

more randomness

How could you not just love life, when after a visit with the neighbors their goats follow you home?

They act like little dogs and follow you everywhere!  So fun...

How often do goats come on your front porch?

Okay, so this one is pitiful. 

Can you guess what the stack on the left represents?

And the lonely one on the right?

You're women, so yep... you guessed it...   the ones on the left don't fit at all.

And the lonely one on the right is the only current pair in my closet that fits. 

Hmmm... frustration.  And three pairs in the left pile are brand new and have never been worn. 

Jeremy says I should just get rid of them all, but who wants to spend money on new jeans if any of these fit someday???  Sigh.. but today I found a great pair that FITS for $17 on mega clearance.  ya hoo!

And this, is the stack of books that sits above my night stand on shelf. 

The little scrolly book thingie on the right can't take anymore books, and truly... I'm reading all of these. 

But you have to add Successful Adoption and Master Your Metabolism to this stack... they were actually on my nightstand when I took this picture. 

I'm just not a constant book reader that finishes one book before starting another.  I have bookmarks in all of these and pick them up depending on my mood that night. 

There ya go, more Amanda randomness. 

the name game, 13 years ago!

Naming babies is one of my favorite things ever!  I knew I wanted to be a Mom, so when I was in college and unmarried about 13 years ago or so, I bought a baby name book and I highlighted all my favorite names... funny, I know!  I pulled it out recently, well actually Annika pulled it out for me and I found it lying on the floor!  And I started revisiting my old favorites, and I came to find that all 4 of my kids names were highlighted! 

Here were my faves... back in the day... 

GIRLS
Aimee
Ainsley
Alayna
Alina
Ally
Alyssa
Amaya
Amalia
ANIKA (we added an N)
Anna (Drew's name if he was a girl, Anna Sabrina!)
Annalisa
Becca
Cameron
Camille
Chelsea
Christa
Christian
Claire
Courtney
Daelynn
Danika
Delaney
Elizabeth
Emma  (Gavin's name if he was a girl, Emma Noelle!)
Emmaline
Felicity (Morgan's middle name)
Hailey
Hannah
Hilary
Isabel
Jalena
Jane
Janey
Jocelyn
Julia
Kaleigh
Kallista
Kate
Kathleen
Kayleigh
Kelsey
Kinsey
Kyla
Laura
Lauren
Lena
Lila
Lilyan
Lindsay
Lynsey
Madison
Malina
Marian
Marisa
Marley
Meagan
Meg
Megan
MORGAN
Natalie
Noelle
Paige
Quincy
Rebekah
Riley
Ryann
Samantha
Shelby
Suzanna
Sydney
Tatiana
Taylor
Teagan
Tori
Trystan
Valerie
Veronica
Winter

Our list 4 kids later is much shorter and simpler... and some of these names??.. I'm wondering what I was thinking!!!  But realize a lot of these are the names of my favorite gymnasts and kids I taught at The Little Gym.  Funny how nice kids influence you to name your kids after them!

BOYS
Aaron (Drew's middle name)
Adam
Ainsley
Andrew
Avery
Bailey
Baldwin
Benjamin
Bradley
Brannon
Braxtom
Brendan
Bryce
Caleb
Chandler
Clayton
Cole
Colin
Connor
Corbin
Cullen
Dalton
Damian
Damon
Daniel
Davin
Dawson
Devon
DREW
Emery
Ethan (Drew's name until 2 weeks before he was born!)
GAVIN
Graham
Hadley
Harrison
Jack
Jamison
Jaron
Jayson
Joel
Jonah
Kaelan
Kameron
Karsten
Kenzie
Landon
Lane
Lucas
Mackenzie
Mark
Matthew
McKenzie
Micah
Nate
Nathan
Nathaniel (Gavin's middle name)
Parker
Paxton
Payton
Preston
Quentin
Quinn
Reagan
Reese
Riley
Ryan
Rylan
Spencer
Tate
Teagan
Trenton
Tristan
Treston
Wade
Wesley
Zachary

I also realized while I was typing them all out,  that a lot of my friend's kid's names are here too!  Sometime soon, I'll share our current baby name list for baby #5!  I still love SO many of these names and a lot of them are still on the list 13 years later...

it really is a gift

Generally, waiting for something to happen is hard!!  Waiting for a baby to be born when you're due or past due is hard.  Waiting to find out test results when you're having health issues is hard.  Waiting to see if you got into the school you were hoping to is... you guessed it - hard!  Waiting can be difficult no matter how big or small the thing you're waiting for may seem.  Adoption is full of waiting!  And waiting, just so you know, is not my forte.  And I'm sure it isn't yours either.  When my sister and friends have adopted, it was really easy for me to look in from the outside and think, "Why are they antsy to speed up the process?  Their child will come when God's timing reveals them!"  Well, now I know how hard waiting in adoption truly is!!!  I could think of a whole list of reasons why one might say that I shouldn't have a hard time waiting....

1. I already have 4 kids, it's not like I don't have enough to do.
2. We've only been actively looking to adopt for 7 months.
3. We don't even have all of our finances to pay for it when it happens.
4. We should be trusting God with this process and not grow impatient!

Thinking of all of these reasons myself, helps me put things into perspective.  I really, truly know that once we are matched with a birthmom things could get crazy, scary, confusing, hairy, expensive, exhilirating, and thrilling!  And I know that time is a gift... we can't take back this time we have.  So I've purposed in my heart to take full advantage. 

I'm starting a journal for our child, that tells about this process.  How we hoped, dreamed, and prayed for them.  I'll write about our positive dealings with their birthmom and the feelings we're experiencing.  The funny things their siblings say about them while we wait, and how others helped bring them home. 

I'll also use this time to plan fundraisers to pay for all of this.  In May (date TBA) we are holding a fundraiser garage sale at a GREAT location here in town... (detailed info will be emailed later!)  We're hoping to make a BIG deal out of this and gather support from our community!  We're accepting donations of things to sell  large and small now if you have anything you'd like to donate to the cause...

And most of all, we're praying.  We'd been doing this from the start.  We're praying for our birthmom and child right now.  That she'll be drawn to us somehow.  That she'll be okay that we have 4 kids already and that she'll want her baby in a large family.  We're praying for smooth interactions with her.  And that all involved will see the hand of God. 

Those are my thoughts lately.  It's been hard this week.  I've had this feeling that it will NEVER happen.  No one will choose us.  I know right where those thoughts are coming from, and they've been not so politely kicked back down where they came from.  And just when I was at my lowest...

we got mail...

a cute little yellow envelope from a friend that I've known for years, but still don't know well enough.  She wrote a sweet note, and enclosed a check that FLOORED our whole family.  They wanted to help with our adoption fund.  YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY  Is all I could say, along with NO WAY!!  as tears streamed down my face.  Thank you, A for blessing us in this way...  and for following God's lead to do so.  You have touched us immeasurably!  God knows our needs and he is faithful to show us how he provides. 

Then last night, God showed me that there may be other avenues to our child.  Two friends emailed at the same time about opportunities in their area, and are spreading the word.  Wow. 

That's all for today...  I'm going to embrace this gift of time to love on my kids and start that journal.

a BUG!

Annika is obsessed with bugs now...  She thinks every speck on the carpet, in her bath, or in the sink when she's brushing her teeth is a bug!  At this moment she and Gavin are trying to catch a friendly little bug on our kitchen floor to show her they aren't scary!  She actually screams and cries and won't walk up the stairs at least once a day because she sees so many "bugs" in her path... 

"Uh, oh... Drew Drew, a bug!" 

"Mom, I see bug!"

and 99% of the time, it's a speck...  sorry little one, you're gonna
frrrreak out when the spiders start coming inside SOON!!!!

mother and daughter Easter Tea!

Last weekend, my Morgan and I had the pleasure of

attending our church's mother/daughter Easter tea. 

I love every chance I get to spend with just one of my

children, however rare it is...  We got dressed up, and enjoyed fun with

friends, an egg hunt, singing, and yummy food!

In 2 more years, Annika will be joining in the fun...

some special buddies

singing complete with hand motions...

Morgan's loot bag after the hunt!

She's a tad competitive like her mama... 

read it?

Today at the library, I happened upon this new book by Jillian Michaels.  I'm not sure why I didn't think to check the library for this book since I've been wanting to read it... but as I browsed the health books, there it sat!  I've thumbed through it enough to find out that Jillian has hypothyroidism like me... so I'll be interested to find out what she says.  I also know she covers toxins in our food, environment, etc... and eating only foods that either grew on the earth or have a mother!  Funny, but good true advise, huh?  So no... Doritos and soda don't cut it!  (I actually don't consume either.. chemicals make me squirm.)  So this is what I'll be reading this next month...  it definitely jumps to the top of my nightstand list over there on the right.   Just thought I'd throw this book out there if you are at all interested in nutrition/exercise like I am! 

ramblings

Everyday I come up with a blog post in my head, but I've been trying to stay off the laptop so my posts never make it past my mind.  The only post left in my head tonight is a jumble of random thoughts that I thought I'd throw out there.  These are the things swirling around in my head lately:

• I've been obsessed with the sitemeter on our adoption info blog.  I'm down to checking it "only" about 3 times a day.  We've had nearly 450 visitors since we launched the blog last fall, and I'm not even sure if one woman that is expecting a baby and wanting to place him/her for adoption is in that number.  We have a bunch of referrals now from Everlasting Adoptions, who we are contracted with... but no bites yet.  Time will tell.  But I feel a bit James Bond-ish being able to track what city/state visitors are coming from.  It's fun, but addicting.  And it gets the mind wandering in places it shouldn't until we get a call saying someone is interested in us. 

• Homeschooling is on the brain a bunch lately.  And it's not because we're engaged in it 4 days a week, it's because I'm not so pleased with how I'm running it.  I know myself, and I know I'm being ultra lazy with it this last semester.  We're getting the bare minimum done, but even that isn't fantastic.  It's boring for all of us.  Some of it has to do with it almost being the end of the year, and some of it has to do with the sporadic way things are being run during the week.  The kids don't know anything is amiss...  they don't know what I'd really like us to be doing.  They happily say, "That's it??  Great! Let's go play!"  I made a list the other night of each school subject we'd like to be covering and the improvements that need to happen and I'm encouraged.  I just received my copy of "Managers of their Homes" in the mail today and I can't wait to devour it.  I love schedules.  I'll let you know how it's going.  I'm just dying to make a list of all the things I'd like to get done in a day and have them help me organize it in a school day schedule.  Each kid will have a section... can't wait.  The thought of it makes my list makey heart jump for joy.

• I've started exercising again after a 6 week hiatus.  It's painful.  I promised myself I wouldn't stop after I did my 30 Day Shred month, but I did.  I was burned out and disappointed by the lack of results on the scale even though my body felt way different.  (sigh)  I'm such an instant results girl.  (sigh)  And if I would have continued... I wouldn't be feeling bummed about starting over and I would have been a firmer girl that would have certainly seen results on the scale by now.  Why am I so tied to the numbers on the scale??  Maybe I should toss it.  But it really feels good to be moving again.  I tried running outside which is my dream... but my knee is still bugging me since the triathlon last May, and I still can't run on it.  boo hoo!  So no big triathlon this year, and I'm still contemplating a smaller one in June if I can find out a way to run.  Jillian Michaels is my DVD friend and she works me hard, so we'll stay friends even though I'd love to be running outside. 

• I planted tulip bulbs outside for the first time last fall, let's hope they appear!

• I wonder if our baby is out there already, nestled in his/her mother's womb?  Drew says he thinks our baby is.  And that he thinks he/she just kicked.  I think so too.  Well, I hope so!

• I'm also realizing lately how prideful I am and have been.  It has shown itself in many different ways in my life over the years, and I'm just now owning up to it.  God has been working with me on this, and it's hard!!  I've been too prideful to see it.  My pride comes in ways that you might not see as pride and in other ways that are blatant pride.  Okay, pride is not looking like a word any more... I've typed it too many times.  pride, pride, pride.... yuck. 

• I can't stand it when my girls' hair is messy after they've been up for a while in the morning when we're here at home.  Silly, I know.  But it makes me feel so much more together when I'm dressed and my girls' hair looks decent.  Not sure what made me think of that, but there it is. 

• I have 4 credits for free books on Paper Back Swap... what books should I request?  I've run out of ideas.  help!  (I love non-fiction and the occasional fiction)

• I have an insanely wonderful husband.  the end.